Who gives you the right!?!

Mom sees her own toddler-aged daughter show up in her Facebook newsfeed being described as “You can’t fix ugly.”  

Imagine scrolling through your news feed, and discovering a picture of your 2 year old daughter being ridiculed for her looks, her clothing , or her expression by virtual strangers.  Sounds like a day-in-the-life of a celebrity, right.  You might assume I am referring to a celebrity, and shrug it off, thinking it’s the price a celebrity pays for fame.  What happens though when this is the reality for us non famous peons? Unfortunately for a few very shocked mamas this experience is all too real. 

In the recent wake of outcries of bullying, especially cyber bullying, it is important to stay aware of the latest types of problems occurring in social media.  These issues of cyberbullying call into question the amount of information we should share on social media sites like Facebook.  We harp at our children, “Should you really post that photo?  Everyone can see it, it is part of your digital footprint.”  We make these blanket warnings about risqué photos or oversharing to our teens, but what about what we share as responsible adults? Like when we share our photos of our beloved children doing what we consider precious things. Or a photo of ourselves in a normal activity? I have to admit, I share photos a lot.  Well, the sad news is if someone is your Facebook friend or you don’t have your photos locked down, they can easily take a screen shot and share that photo in many ways.    A recent explosion over a secret group, the now defunct “Chat Soup” opened many a protective mama’s to how problematic cyberbullying is.  Who ever thought their precious 2 or 3 or 4 year old would be the object of an adult's ridicule?

Here is a little backstory.  There is a whole world of Facebook pages that the average user may not know about.  Did you know one person can have multiple Facebook pages?  That’s right.   People use fake names all the time.  Gasp right?  Lots of crazy people out there, but lots of normal people have secondary Facebook accounts for not so nefarious reasons.  Just one example are secondary pages used to Buy, Sell, and Trade all sorts of items without nosy friends and relatives knowing about those activities.   Well these pages often become friends with other secondary pages and that is when problems begin.  The mom—actually moms-- who were affected by this child-bashing were in a closed group with these types of pages.  These bully moms created a secret group to malign other moms in their Buy, Sell, Trade group.  Well the wrong mom got added and BAM!  It all blew up.  The boards of clothing lovin’ mamas exploded with vitriol against these bullies.  The bullies’ Facebook pages were instantly pulled down, and likely re-created in new forms. 

So how do we respond?  I’m not sure.  I think there are major flaws in how easily we can repost things with the advances of technology.  Sure they are convenient, but convenience always comes with a price tag.  The sad reality is bullying is a problem in the adult world as much as for our children.  There are also groups dedicated to making fun of other moms and I’m sure a host of other niches I’m sure.  Have we all been elevated to celebrity status by the connection of social media?  Have we all willingly consented to be “fair game” for other’s entertainment?  I hope not.  I hope common decency wins.  I know the support that was showered on these mamas has been overwhelmingly positive.  Salve to bitter wounds that should have never been created.  You do not want to anger these mama bears. 

Should there be repercussions for these bullies?  Should we post their names, contact their employers?  I think not because I am generally of the "turn the other cheek mentality."  Had it been my daughter, maybe I would yelling a battle cry.